Most painful feelings arise in the interpretation we give to different life situations. You can reduce the pain by changing the tonal interpretations and points of view the reality that exists.
From time to time, we all negative thoughts, painful arouse suspicion and fear that cause a rut and paralysis. How we interpret different situations is what makes the difference between security fear, between hope and despair, between the experience of victims and sense of control between victory and defeat. Many studies and the everyday reality we are witnesses to how negative attitudes and perpetual dissatisfaction, are detrimental to the physical and mental well-being.
People who are satisfied with their lives, characterized by common thinking patterns, such as:
• thoughts of despair and self-deprecation that reduce their ability to execute and realize the potential that ultimately sabotage all chances of success. These reflections beginning with a statement like: “I can not …” “Not good enough …” “Not sure …” “I do not have the skills required …”, “sure I would fail …” and so on. Repetitive thoughts of despair and self-deprecating tone of which have OCD and depression, that make you the worst enemy of yourself, your main categories.
• hypotheses, assumptions and negative commentaries -tzorh welfare of negative thinking is to take a given situation and give it a negative interpretation, Fasimit. Some people approach “half empty” natural and automatic for them. Most of the tasks and assignments in their lives, passing them off automatically about to experience severe or catastrophic. There is no question that there are serious life experiences and challenging. But this article refers to those persons most tasks becomes an emotional burden. They have difficulty to take it at face value, the power “is what got …”. The way a person chooses to take it, is what makes them positive or negative experience. This selection can strengthen and intensify or weaken and decrease, causing the experience of control or victims. This is a prime consideration and determines, often, the mental health status and well-being.
• Compare constant (compared) – One common way to feel weak, insecure and desperate is to compare yourself after the / s will not be beneficial with you. Compare those with higher achievement, more assertive, more profit, more friends, etc., often leads to a feeling of despair, stress, tension, anxiety, lack of motivation and a sense there is no choice. Compared to negative social sense who want what we think the other is achieved and there is a lack of belief that you can achieve the same or higher. In these situations there is no motivation for change and power is always accompanied.
• recurrent thoughts about the past -bmhlc life we may experience failures, grief, loss and pain. There are people engaged in repeated those memories and burning pain that accompanies. This re-thinking usually leads to avoidance and emotional blasts and practical inability to identify new opportunities, recognition and exercise of our inherent potential. Established fact is, we can not change the past, but we can shape and influence the future. Sometimes, the most significant step is to tell yourself that you are not just your history, it’s time to take charge of your life and example, to make better choices to move on. I remember Shimon Peres who has experienced setbacks and failures aplenty and he did not give up. It seems that those failures have strengthened and enhanced it eventually brought him roles to come.
• The surround ourselves with people “poisoning” – most of us people we met during our lives that weaken us and make us eliminate the feeling of insecurity and self-worth. Addressing and meeting with them, very tempting to believe that we are victims and victimizers in our behavior that by abolishing they have control and grip our lives. These positions, even if they are true weaken the self “.
When we are surrounded by people like that, the key to change is to make a person responds and operated proactive person. There are behavioral strategies that help to exit this maze. Even in situations where dealing with people Nrtzistiim, manipulative, passive-aggressive, domineering and threatening, there are effective ways of coping. Basic right of a person not to feel threatened, to be able to express their feelings and opinions, determine its priorities. Have the right to say “no” without feeling guilty, to protect ourselves in situations of threat of physical, mental and emotional. Believe that we deserve respect.
• The need to blame others -isnm people tend to (permanently) to blame others for their own failures. They are busy explaining, make excuses and blame others for their failures such as their parenting, marriage, failed economic investment, different health conditions or other everyday problems. There is no doubt that life presents challenges for cause suffering and pain. But when blame others for reasons Laomllotc and your failure, you put yourself in victimization does not allow for growth and change. Apparently, it is a relief In feeling a victim, this placenta of relief when we do not take responsibility and blame others dissatisfaction with our lives. The position of victimhood removes liability by depositing change and other key satisfaction of our lives. Ultimately, when you blame the other troubles you become embittered, angry, helpless, being constantly filled with suffering.
Often, these people do not treat you blame and not be aware of how you feel. Eventually you become a prisoner of your anger. Many times, your feelings are justified, but it does not help you to be happy, happy, healthy and more successful.
• Challenge forgive yourself -bmhlc life we all make mistakes, wrong decisions and actions which we are sorry and regret and with a sense of guilt. And wallowing in self-doubt, thinking you are “stupid”, “bad”, “damaged”, “unsuccessful” Z does not help at all. Have to learn to show compassion for yourself, especially in situations of self-anger, knowing that now you are more aware, there’s a chance in the future to avoid the mistakes you made in the past and make a positive change with yourself and others.
• fear of failure and making mistakes – fear of failure and making a mistake in many cases supplies Nrtzistiim and perfectionism. There are no “good” there is only “excellent”. The feeling that you are not good enough and successful, increases the stress and anxiety when you want to achieve. There are people you have set high standards serves as an effective tool to increase motivation. While others expect themselves to be perfect and with zero mistakes – that causes them to despair, irritability, loss of joy of life and effectively limits and minimizes the potential for success.
Many studies suggest a link between perfectionism, depression, feeling of unhappiness and dissatisfaction. Therefore, it is important to learn how not to blame others and to take personal responsibility for change, including checking sources dissatisfaction. Treatment can treat various emotions and allow Listening bring a deep understanding and connection somewhere else, find the appropriate way to channel positive places. It should be remembered that life much more than one understand and interpret different situations. Flexible and diverse interpretations, ultimately helps better performance and greater well-being.